Cathryn

I was diagnosed officially in July 2020 with Autism Spectrum Disorder. Autism spectrum disorder (ASD) is a developmental disorder that affects communication and behavior. I was diagnosed later than normal, at 31 years old. It has been said that women are diagnosed later than men. I was put on epilepsy medications in October 2020, with a more formal diagnosis in January 2021. Epilepsy is a neurological disorder marked by sudden recurrent episodes of sensory disturbance, loss of consciousness, or convulsions, associated with abnormal electrical activity in the brain.

Yes, I do not look any different. I do not have a wheelchair, and furthermore, I can use words to describe my actions, feelings, needs, and wants. Understanding what others say can be challenging; I am my own best advocate as my talk therapist will remind me of all the time. I ask others to explain in another way if I don’t understand what they say.  Social situations can be hard and awkward because reading social cues and body language is not something that I was born with the ability to do. Furthermore, I was not born with a sense of taboo or cultural norms.  Regardless, that’s not why I’m writing this. I am not writing this to look for sympathy or pity. I am a human of St. Martin’s, and since coming back, I am on my own journey of discovery.

When I got the diagnosis, I was not at all surprised. I have always been a unique thinker, loving the in-depth conversations of Episcopal and Roman Catholic churches.  I have never had many friends, and have had one significant romantic relationship that could have led to marriage. In my opinion, epilepsy and autism creates challenges, but it also allows for another perspective. God would not have created me this way if there was no reason for it. I believe that my dissertation, once I get it done, will show the world that I do have value. I am a human of St. Martin’s, and I invite anyone to come and ask me any question that they would like about the diagnoses, strengths, weaknesses, ways to help me, or any other curiosities you have about neuro-diversity. I don’t know everything, but I will try to answer any questions you may have. 

And to any other neurodiverse people out there, please know that I would love to be your friend. Please know that bullies are mean because they have their own yuck that they haven’t dealt with yet. Please know that being weird can be a good thing; the smartest mathematician alive--Albert Einstein--was, after all, considered weird by his classmates. He was also autistic. Lastly, neurodiverse friends, please know that you aren’t alone and that God loves YOU.